The stars lit up the sky while the moon drifted behind the dark clouds. I could hear the crickets creeping up on me through the headphones that blasted music into my ears. I always took walks at night before I went to sleep. My mom reminded me, “not too long.” I just needed a breather, anyway. Walking around my complex once or twice usually gave me just that.
I stopped half way through to spread my body onto the grass. It was cold, nearly damp. I made sure I was far enough from the houses so the lights wouldn’t spot me. But I could still see the shadows of the dogs being walked, and the cars passing by. The darkness surrounding me was bearable. I wasn’t scared to be alone for once. It just felt good to… breath. Usually when I took my walks I would see cop lights passing through the cemetery. This area was known for kids to hang out at. So the flashing red and blue lights were just a reminder that someone was always watching.
The cemetery was to the left of where I was sprawled out. If I were to walk a little further, I would stumble upon a road that lead to the entrance of the graves. I always kept my distance from there because I didn’t know who, or what, would be waiting. But there was always that curiosity. Would I come across the crowd that constantly left behind beer bottles and cigarette butts? The lights made their rounds again so if I wanted to give into my thoughts, I only had a few minutes to do so. I slowly scooted my way closer to the abandoned road. As my presence became known, I heard barking further down. It was the same damn dog that always made noise. He was small, but he looked like he’d do just about anything to get through that flimsy gate. So I stopped, changed the song playing from my iPod and let the dog calm down.
The lights passed by again, slowly making its way down the roads filled with lifeless bodies. Instead of moving closer, I let the grass cradle my body. The stars seemed to be watching over me. The music traveled through my skin and into my soul. This was the relaxation I needed. I craved it. I found it.
As my eyes were close to shutting completely, I began to feel uneasy. I looked at the time and realized I needed to be home in a few minutes. But something was telling me not to move. I waited for this feeling to shake. But I suddenly didn’t feel so safe anymore and realized I should’ve just listened to my gut. It wasn’t just me underneath this quiet sky…
I was no longer alone. And I had no where to run.
Photo cred: @tonesnaps